Tips to Get Married :How to find your Muslim Partner.
1)The Criteria to look in a Muslim Spouse
The Criteria to look in finding a Muslim spouse are four:
Abu Huraira (Radhiyallahu Anhu) has reported Allah’s Messenger (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) as saying: A woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, her status. her beauty and her religion, so try to get one who is religious, may your hand be besmeared with dust. (Book 8, Number 3457)
The same holds true when looking for a husband, as our beloved Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said, “When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied, asks to marry your daughter, comply with his request. If you do not do so, there will be corruption and great evil on earth.” (Tirmidhi)
2) It is best to Marry a Spouse who is Religious
According to another hadeeth in sahih muslim a pious Woman is the best Provision in the whole world.
The first thing we should look for when marrying is how committed the person is to Islam. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said, “A woman is normally sought as a wife for her wealth, beauty, nobility, or religiousness (adherence to Islam), so choose a religious woman and you will prosper.” (Muslim) “A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser.”(Bukhari) “The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman. (Muslim)
3) Recommended to Marry Partners of Equal status although it is not a criteria if the Person is Religious.
‘Ā’ishah said,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:”Select (fit) women (in respect of character) for your seed, and marry (your) equals and give (your daughters) in marriage to them.”(Muslim 9:46)
3) Look first for spouse who are Virgin
“And marry those among you who are single” (24:32).While Divorced Women Should also not be Prevented from getting Married,
4)Choose your Partner who is Willing to Marry you
Sometimes,under Parental Pressure few People get Married only to repent later. No Marriage is Valid withoutt the Permission of the bride.
The Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said, “A matron should not be given in marriage except after consulting her; and a virgin should not be given in marriage except after her permission.” The people asked, “O Allah’s Apostle! How can we know her permission?” He said, “Her silence (indicates her permission).” (Volume 7, Book 62, Number 67: Narrated Abu Huraira)
5)Know the Women Who are Forbidden to You
“Forbidden to you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and your paternal aunts, and your maternal aunts, and brothers’ daughters, and sisters’ daughters, and your mothers that have suckled you, and your foster-sisters, and mothers of your wives, and your step-daughters who are in your guardianship born of your wives to whom you have gone in–but if you have not gone in to them, there is no blame on you–and the wives of your sons who are of your own loins, and that you should have two sisters together except what has already passed………..and all married women except those whom your right hands possess” (4:23, 24)
6)It is Permitted to see the face of Spouse you are going to Marry
The man has permission to see her face before agreeing to marry as the Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said, “Go and look at her (the woman you are considering marrying) because this will help your time together to be strengthened.” (Ahmad)
7)Marriage Shouldn’t be kept Secret
It is not Recommended to Marry in Secret.Marriage should be held in a public place and announced with the beat of duff, a musical instrument . The contract is sanctified by a sermon before the parties announce their acceptance . Gatherings on the occasion of marriage are also a means of making it publicly known
Do You Want to Get Married?
Nikah is one of the Islamic laws to which the Messenger, peace be upon him, encouraged the youth saying: “O youthful people, if any of you have the means to, he should get married, as it lowers the eyesight and protects the private parts. Those who have not the ability to do so should fast, as it will be a shield for him.” (Bukhari and Muslim).
Do you want to get married?But don’t know how to proceed?May Allah bless you and help you chose a life partner who become a delight of your eyes.I would like to share an advice on finding life Partner.
Traditionally,Parents sought the groom/bride for their children through local contacts or relatives.Then emerged the agents or the intermediaries and now,it is the age of matrimony.The world has become a global place.Today everyone has an internet presence.
Arranged marriages are standard practice in many societies, but the introductions and screening process can be an ordeal for the young people involved – even if they are pleased with the eventual outcome. Some Western Muslims have concluded that online matchmaking can help reduce embarrassment.
Matrimonial websites have emerged as the answer to the quest of finding a life partner. The Best thing about such websites is, one can decide about the life partner himself/herself and search without having to pester brokers or bother parents. It’s completely about the option to select what one wants – social status, income, likes, dislikes, caste, religion, geographical location, special cases, second marriages – you name it, you have it.
Some Statistics of Success of Marriage via Matrimony
It is not surprising that Western Muslims adapted the idea to their needs. For many, online dating offers a low-stress solution to the daunting challenge of finding a partner for marriage in countries where few share their faith, and in communities where matchmaking is considered a family affair.
The study, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences and funded by eHarmony, examined the marital status and satisfaction of 19,131 people who tied the knot between 2005 and 2012.
Of the nearly 20,000 respondents, 35 percent met their spouses online. Within that group, nearly half met through online dating sites, “whose number of users has increased dramatically just over the past decade,” according to the research. Others reported meeting their spouses through social media, chat rooms, and e-mail, among other online venues.
And while the research found that nearly 8 percent of marriages initiated offline ended in breakups, couples who met online reported lower rates of separation and divorce — 6 percent.
“What is clear from this research is that a surprising number of Americans now meet their spouse on-line,” the research states, and “Meeting a spouse on-line is, on average, associated with slightly higher marital satisfaction and lower rates of marital break-up than meeting a spouse through traditional (off-line) venues.”
Some Matrimonial sites:
There are Different Muslim Matrimonial Websites which you can try .Here I am listing few websites that cater globally and to both Shia and Sunni Muslims.You can refine your search in the Premium version although free ones are worth trying too.
This website is a source of matrimonial profiles for Muslim singles. There are features like free registration, free upload of picture, Muslim chat, text messages, e-cards and even SMS to potential Muslim brides or grooms. The live chat and sending e-cards option is available to only premium members.
- They use latest technology and have a 24/7 technical support for all members available in English, French, Arabic and Urdu
- They maintain an ethical standards to ensure safe and halal atmosphere
- 100% anonymity for ultimate security – your personal contact information is always safe
- They have a strict privacy and anti-spam policy .Their email notifications are certified by Yahoo and Hotmail
- (new and improved) standards-compliant website supporting latest technologies
- Qiran.com is the preferred partner of MSN Arabia matchmaker
Muslima.com has helped thousands of Muslim singles find their match. It is one of the leading Islamic matrimonial sites. Not many other sites can offer you a membership database of over 5 million members with the promise of introducing you to single Muslim men and women across the world.
Positive Features of Muslima.com
- Muslima.com allows free members to reply to messages they receive. This means you may not even have to pay to use the dating site.This is unlike most other Muslim dating sites, where usually only paid members can communicate with each other.
- You can contact and receive messages from paying members for free
- Easy to determine who is a paying member
- No advertising on the site
- If a profile is in a different language, it will be translated to your selected language
- Can filter searches by when the member last signed on (week, one, three or six months)
- The ability to tailor what email notification messages you receive from the Muslima.com, including options such as being notified if someone has expressed interest in you
Nikah.com is the most trusted and widely used matrimonial site exclusively for the benefit of the Muslims around the world.
- International presence :USA | UK | Canada |Australia | Middle East | India | Pakistan | Malaysia |Singapore | Indonesia
- nikah.com ensures utmost security checks at various levels and exercising vigil at every stage so that no mal-practice creeps in at any time. As far as security or privacy of members are concerned, nikah.com exercises utmost caution by making available to its Members the latest on line technology for providing members with relevant and reliable matrimonial information in a strictly confidential manner
- It claims No friendship
- No dating
Muslima Dating.com is a new emerging Matrimonial Service.It is a bit flexible than the other two.You can try it because you can expect many offers from the site as it is new .It is free to register. Upgrading is far less than what the other commercial dating sites charge.
To be true, even I too am married via Matrimony site and so is my sister.My husband is an engineer and her’s is a dentist.Alhumdulillah, Allah has bestowed us with a loving spouse and a good family.Like most People even I didn’t believed in Matrimony.My matrimonial Profile was created by my sister on persuasion by my mother.And it was just for fun.My father began to get loads of call from suitable grooms.I remember he used to walk behind me with his diary containing the details of the groom.Since it was the first time anyone from our family was trying married via matrimony,everyone laughed at the idea.But eventually I got my life Partner who was meant for me.And for my sister we did the same.Alhumdulillah she too is married to a young handsome brother with a promising career.
So basically my Point is that we should not be judgemental about the matrimony sites.However there may be some fake trolls in the sites,but usually the people who really want to marry give their full details and you can search them and their relatives in Social Media
Here are some Tips for productive usage of Matrimony sites:
- Try out the website features for free before buying the paid package Look for privacy features and test their effectiveness
- Screen the profiles for irrelevant and/or inappropriate content.
- Scrutinize profile information by cross-checking with social media sites, websites or other knowledgeable sources. There might be con artistes out there who are looking for easy preys.
- Set up a separate email account for matrimonial correspondence;
- Reveal contact information only after thorough background check Do not reveal any financial information without knowing the person and testing the trustworthiness.
- Be wary of fake profiles – profiles intended to extract personal / financial information by posing as matrimonial aspirants Be wary of profiles of people who do not want to marry but use the website as a contact point to get in touch with people for dating.
- Set up meeting with the prospective partner and their families in a public place.
Hope You find your best half.Do Remember us in your Prayers.
Jazak Allah Khairan.