5 Struggles of Reverts -Things We should be compassionate about .
Assalamu Alaikum wrwb ,
Reverts are the handpicked Special People among us whom Allah choose to guide . Sadly We born Muslims are not so compassionate about their Problems. Sometimes we act so rude that it ends up demotivating them and push them to the brisk of leaving Islam.
Here are 5 Struggles faced by Muslim Reverts. Let us read their struggle in their Own words. And let us do our best to help even a single new Muslim we Know in our Community.
Revert’s Struggle 1 : Being Labelled as Revert/Convert
I hate the label “convert or revert” its insulting and puts us in a lower category of Muslims. The question “are you a born Muslim or revert?” Is a way to outcast converts. Muslims should not have to be given such judgmental titles. Muslims are Muslims. Why does it matter if someone is a born Muslim or revert? I mean, we worship the same god. I hope this changes. I hope more awareness is shown in this area.
Revert’s Struggle 2 : Face Disrespect on seeking Spouse
My struggle is with finding a husband. The brothers I have met they seem not to accept I have a past as a Kafiroon. They say Allah has forgiven all your past sins when you took your Shahada but they also try with me to see if I am an easy woman. They lack respect in speech. It doesn’t matter to them if I have a wali they simply don’t respect me.
Revert’s Struggle 3 : Not having enough resources for new Muslims
Most masjids seem segregated into each cultural group and you may find sisters that say Salam to you but other than that there is not much in the way of community for a Muslim that is not born Muslim and is american . A lot of cultures are untrusting of Americans and view us differently even if we are Muslim.
I kind of wish their was a masjid geared towards reverts that had Quran classes and woman’s gatherings . I feel there is just not enough out there in the way of support for the reverts . Some woman are looking for a husband but as soon as any American revert goes to the masjid he’s probably being told to marry a virgin by all the born Muslims and so he no longer looks to his own culture and is looking for a foreign born Muslim woman to marry because now he being told his own culture is not good enough .
Revert’s Struggle 4 : Loneliness due to disappointed Family Member
My biggest struggle I find is having to teach myself and learn all on my own, I struggle to discipline myself whether it be about wearing hijab or making salat on time and the lack of support or encouragement etc. It’s so hard when you have no support because all your family disagree and are disappointed with your choice, you have no one to share the beauty of Islam or the journey you are going through with Not to mention some of my family and particularly every single one of my previous none muslim friends have just completely turned their backs on me.
Revert’s Struggle 5 : Being Judgemental about them
Feeling like I’ll never really be “accepted” in the Muslim born / raised community, not understanding getting the hang of certain phrases and terms. Not looking “normal” in hijab ( I don’t really know how else to explain this one.) others thinking I reverted for a man. Not knowledgeable enough. These are the main ones I can think of right now.
Things We can do to Support our Revert Brothers and Sisters –
1. The New Reverts have just made the biggest decision of their lives, and changed their religion to one that they are unfamiliar with in many ways. They are learning new things consistently. Let us give them time.
- They have no blood relatives to talk to about Islam, no one to clarify things, and no family support to be offered in the entire process. All of these things can cause an immense amount of stress and disillusionment. It’s common for converts to have moments of breakdown where they feel like nobody is on their side. We shouldn’t increase their distress with our remarks or make them feel that we are offended with anything they have said or done.
3. They need Muslim Friends -Their friends might stick around for a while, but chances are their habits are not always what a new Muslim wants to be around. After they deny a few invitations to go to parties, they might stop calling all together.This can cause a lot of depression and loneliness . If you know someone,who is a revert ,call them to Iftar,Visit them,be polite with them.
4. The Reverts already deal with various different advice and differences in fiqh , and it’s very discouraging to have someone correct you in a harsh way. The ideal way to correct a convert is the way of the Rasulullah SAW, with kindness and understanding. Remember that the Sahaba were Converts and how fine was the dealing of Rasul Allah SAW with them .
- Give them time .They will learn Slowly . The tribe of Thaqif agreed to embrace Islam but told the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him):“We will not give out any charity, and we will not fight in the way of Allah (Jihad)”. The Prophet accepted that from them, and he told his companion: “They will (willingly) pay charity and perform Jihad when they embrace Islam” (Abu Dawud and authenticated by Al-Albani).
May Allah help all the new Muslims .Let us keep them in our Prayers this Ramadan.
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