Advertisements
ad

In a Relationship Problem?Relationship Tips from Islam.

relationship tips from islam

Relationship Tips -“What Does A Woman Want?”

Why Marriages Breaks over Time?What Does a Woman need in a Marriage ?Are you in a Relationship which is withering away with time?Do you find it difficult to Understand a Woman ?Do you have a feeling that It is your wife who is responsible for the lack of Emotions in your Marriage.Well,I do not deny that there can be  a Problem with Women too but If Your Wife was a Beautiful Angel when you Married her and the difference in her nature and her Character are a recent development you need to blame yourself.Here are Few Relationship Tips for the Husbands to Identify the Problem in their Wife :

marriageLook at your Wife,

Is she changing?

Is she behaving a little differently?

Is she becoming careless?

Is she developing medical symptoms to which all reports give an OK certificate.

Is she OK?

Instead of understanding the turmoil she is going through,Men tend to make the situation worse and push their wife into depression.Research says that If the Person she loves doesn’t Understand her Emotional and Psycological Needs-

  • She would lose interest in her house, children and, above all, in you. Your house would always be in a messy condition. She would not be prepared to make efforts for a person who does not love her.
  • Your wife may become ill or have a nervous breakdown. She may seek popularity with others if she is not satisfied with you. She may grow so cold towards you and the house that she may even seek for a divorce.

A notable Scholar of Islam Ayatullah-ibrahim-amini said in one of his lecture to Men.”Dear Men,You are responsible for all this because you have failed to keep her content. It is certainly true that some divorce procedures take place as a result of unkindliness.”

I would like to draw the attention of Men to the following statistics. The psychological requirement of affection, the carelessness of husbands with regard to their wives’ wishes and the overlooking of the importance of the mental status of women, have been responsible for many divorce cases.”In the year 1969, out of a total of 10372 separations, 1203 women expressed the reason for their divorce as losing heart in life, feeling worthless, and the lack of care of their husband with regard to their wives’ desires and emotional feelings.”

“A woman said in court that ‘She was prepared to abandon her dowry and even pay her husband a sum of money to make him agree to a divorce. She said her husband was more interested in his parrots and that was why she did not want to live with him any longer.”

We Forget the Purpose of Our Marriage

It is the Mercy of Allah that he has created us in Pairs .With Marriage we get a Loving Partner who becomes our Soulmate and help us in all Struggles of Life.Allah says in Quran :

رَبِّ اشْرَحْ لِي صَدْرِي ; وَيَسِّرْ لِي أَمْرِي ; وَاحْلُلْ عُقْدَةً مِنْ لِسَانِي ; يَفْقَهُوا قَوْلِي

وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجاً لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لآيَاتٍ لِقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

“And among His Signs is this that He created for you wives (spouses) from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for people who reflect.”(Aayah No. 21, Surah Ar-Rūm, Chapter No. 30, Holy Qur’an).

Infact Marriage is Considered as a Completion of Half of the deen.Al-Bayhaqi narrated in Shu’ab al-Eemaan from al-Raqaashi: “When a person gets married he has completed half of his religion, so let him fear Allaah with regard to the other half.” Al-Albaani said of these two hadeeths in Saheeh al-Targheeb wa’l-Tarheeb (1916)

Love Between Spouse is loved by Allah.Marriage is like an Ibadat(Worship)where the Spouse Completes half of the deen .We Marry for the Sake of Allah and We love him/her for the sake of Allah but after few years of Marriage Couples forget the Purpose of Marriage and the Person who used to be the apple of their eyes becomes the throne in their life.Let us take an effort to Understand  Woman from the Islamic texts :

People Complain that It is Very tough to Understand Women.An English scholar is quoted saying,

“The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my 30 years of research into the feminine soul, is: ‘What does a woman want?’”sigmomd feud

But is it so Hard. I mean why can’t you go to your wife and simply ask her what she wants?Lack of communication is the biggest hurdle in marriage.Men wants respect and appreciation from their wife but if you don’t give her a space to communicate ,I doubt if you would really succeed in marriage.

Relationship tips for Muslims

Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

The most complete of the believers in faith, is the one with the best character. And the best of you are those who are best to their women.”(At-Tirmidhi and authenticated by Al-Albani)

To the men who think that the only responsibility towards their wife is to feed and clothe her.They are in utter confusion.Marriage needs a strong Emotional Bonding.There are many lessons we can learn from the Life of Rasoolullah which can help in strenghtening the bond of our Marriage.

The Psychology & Nature of Women

Before going into any Other facts,First of all We should accept the Fact that Women are Created Differently.This is Proved by the Following Hadeeth :

The Prophet – peace be upon him – said: “Treat women kindly, they were created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is the highest part thereof; so, if you tried to rectify the rib it will be broken and if you left the rib as it is, it will remain crooked, and women are just like this; therefore treat them kindly”.Narrated by: Abu Huraira – Degree: Right – the narrator: Al-Bukhari – The Source: Al-Jame’ Al-Sahih – Page or number: 3331

This tradition is not for dispraising women as understood by the public, contrary, it is for teaching and educating men. Moreover, this tradition expressed the accurate understanding of the nature of the women and indicated the possibility of leaving the woman as it is in the permissible things but to guide her if she exceeded the permissible limits such as doing the sins and neglecting the duties.

What Does a Woman Need ?

The Number One thing a Woman needs is LOVE

Relationship Tips for Muslims

 

Your wife before marrying you was enjoying her parents’ love and kindness. Now that she has entered into marriage agreement with you and now that she has chosen to live with you for the rest of her life, she expects you to fulfill her desires for love and affection. She expects you to show more love to her than she received from her parents and friends. She has trusted you extremely and that is why she has entrusted you with her existence.

Many People believe that their primary role towards their wife is just to provide them food and clothing and expect from them everything.They fail to build the emotional connection with their wife and eventually the marriage either result in lifelong frustration or it just fails completely.Lets understand the emotional needs of a women:

1)The fundamental emotional need of a woman is to be loved.

2)To make a woman feel loved give her the three AAAs:

  • Attention,
  • Affection,
  • & Appreciation.

As long as each partner is fulfilled by the emotional needs of the other, the intimate relationship will thrive.

If Your Complain about your wife is her Not Following your ALL Commands

 

It is  a Misconception among Men that Women have to Obey her husband Silently and bear everything without a Word.

Some people are of the opinion that a wife has to obey her husband silently, even if he treats her in a wrong manner; she is not supposed to complain about her husband, as he is her appointed Imam. This is a wrong concept. A wife is not supposed to obey her husband if he asks her to do anything against the will of Allah and His Messenger (PBUH). Now if such a situation leads to clash, then what shall the lady do? Should she keep quiet? No; Islam has given her the right to complain about her husband. Refer to following:

It was narrated from Aishah (RA) that she said: “Praise be to Allah Whose hearing encompasses all voices. Khawlah came to Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) complaining about her husband, but I could not hear what she said. Then Allah, the Mighty & Sublime, revealed:

قَدْ سَمِعَ اللَّهُ قَوْلَ الَّتِي تُجَادِلُكَ فِي زَوْجِهَا وَتَشْتَكِي إِلَى اللَّهِ وَاللَّهُ يَسْمَعُ تَحَاوُرَكُمَا إِنَّ اللَّهَ سَمِيعٌ بَصِيرٌ

“Indeed Allah has heard the statement of her that disputes with you concerning her husband, and complains to Allah. And Allah hears the argument between you both. Verily, Allah is All-Hearer, All-Seer.” – Aayah No. 1, Surah Al-Mujadilah, Chapter No. 58, Holy Qur’an.(Hadith No. 3490, Book of Divorce, Sunan An-Nasa’i, Vol. 4).

This is regarding Khawlah bint Tha’labah who came to Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) complaining about her husband, and said, “O Allah’s Messenger (PBUH)! He spent my wealth, exhausted my youth and my womb bore abundantly for him. When I became old, unable to bear children, he pronounced Zihar on me. O Allah! I complain to you.” Zihar means saying of a husband to his wife that ‘you are unlawful to me for co-habitation just like my mother’. On this Surah Al-Mujadilah was revealed.

Therefore, a woman has a right of raising her voice and complaining about her husband, in case he does not deal with her justly.

Husbands should adopt a soft attitude towards their wives. It is their duty to take care of them, provide them with shelter, food, clothing and take care of all their daily requirements. They should treat them well, love them and be friendly with them.

Do You Dislike Some of your Wife’s Characteristics ?

Relationship tips for Muslims

Let me give you some evidence from the life of Our Prophet -Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) on how he treated his wife when his wife(our Mothers in Islam) committed blunders:

Every human has some shortcomings. It is natural for a wife also to have some negatives in her personality. But Allah advises the husbands to look into positives of the wives. Try to ignore her shortcomings and be patient. Let me quote a hadith in this context:

It was narrated from Umm Salamah (RA) that she brought some food in a dish of hers to Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) & his Companions, then Aishah (RA) came, wrapped up in a garment, with a stone pestle and broke the dish. The Prophet (PBUH) gathered the broken pieces of the dish and said (to his Companions), “Eat; your mother got jealous,” twice. Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) took the dish of Aishah (RA) and sent it to Umm Salamah (RA) and he gave the dish of Umm Salamah (RA) to Aishah (RA).(Hadith No. 3408, Book of Kind Treatment of Women, Sunan An-Nasa’i, Vol. 4)

Imagine how would an average man behave if his wife smacked a dish out of jealousy in front of his guests? But our beloved Prophet (PBUH) observed patience. And he advised same thing to his followers, as can be seen in following hadith:

It was narrated that Abu Hurairah (RA) said: Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) said, “No believing man should hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one of her characteristics, he may be pleased with another.”.

Are you Silently Suppressing her Personality?

relationship tips for Muslims

From Islamic point of view, there is no harm if a married woman works. She is allowed to pursue professional careers, earn money and grow in their careers on equal terms with males. Example can be taken of Syeda Khadija (RA); she was a successful businesswoman.

Life Plans of Spouse should be respected.You Should not frown and show lack of interest in something she is excited about.Everyone is different.Unless you make an effort to understand and encourage her in the halal things she like,You won’t be able to earn her respect.

Quality conversation is also very important for healthy relationships. It involves sharing experiences, thoughts and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted context. A good partner will not only listen, but offer advice and respond to assure their partner that they are really listening. Husbands and wives don’t expect their partners to solve their problems. Sometimes they just need a sympathetic listener.

Beware of Lack of Openness with Your Partner:

Many couples make the mistake of not putting everything on the table for discussion from the onset. A successful marriage is a team work.Women need a sense of Protection.You hide all your stuffs and expect her to open up everything .How would she feel A sense of warmth in you if she doesn’t trust you.There are many issues that needs to be discussed.You cannot just impose your decisions on her and expect her to follow everything without a single fail.As said,marriage is a team work where two persons share the responsibilities,things should be clear and there should be a scope of communication.

Even Our Prophet Consulted his wives on certain matter and he was not at all Dictatorial as some husbands of today.

The Prophet – peace be upon him – has consulted his wives in the most delicate and important matters such as consulting his wife Um Salama – May Allah be pleased with her – in Al-Hudaibia Treaty. The Prophet – Peace be upon him – has written the treaty between him and the polytheists of Quraish in Al-Hudaibia region, in the Hudaibia year and told his companions: Go to make immolation and shave, but no one responded. The Prophet – peace be upon him – repeated that three times but still no one responded to him. Then the Prophet – Peace be upon him – went to Um Salama and told her about the matter. Hearing that, Um Salam said: O Prophet of Allah, just go and don’t speak to any one until you make your immolation and shave. The Prophet – Peace be upon him – went out and did not speak to any one until he did the same. Seeing that, the companions stood and make their immolation and began shaving for each other to the degree that some of them was about to kill the other out of their grief.Narrated by: Um Salama Hind Bint Abi Umayiah – Degree: successive – the narrator: Ibn Jarir Al-Tabari – The Source: Tafsir Al-Tabari

Don’t become a muderer of Emotional health of Your Spouse

Harsh but true ; The changes you see in your wife is a product of your own negligence towards her emotional requirements. Marriage is a foundation based on love and respect. Women are tender.They take things more seriously,and your every act of misbehavior towards her is killing the respect you have built in her over the years.Two things should be borne in mind

  • Never scold her in Public.Everyone does a mistake.Even the Prophet(pbuh) has advised to counsel a person privately.(hadeeth:)
  • Never Insult her in front of anyone.She has her own self respect.Even you do so many blunders,But If you want Allah to hide your faults,why do you reveal hers.

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said :

A believer must not hate a believing woman (i.e., his wife); if he dislikes one of her traits he will be pleased with another.” (Muslim)

A woman with a moaning husband,who only picks up her faults would not take him seriously. She may even ignore his proper and important points of concern. She would reason for herself “Why should I waste my energy, if my husband is not ever satisfied with my work?”

Not only would she ignore her husband’s criticism, but might even take retaliatory measures.

This is when their house turns into a battlefield. Constant criticism of each other would then prepare the ground for separation and thus a family unit breaks down. In this scenario the woman is not to be blamed because even a wise and patient wife would run out of patience as a result of continuously humiliating attitude of her husband.

Wrong Choice of words

Constantly creating a negative energy in your wife by pointing out her mistakes make her psycologically disable and she begin to think that she is incapable of doing the correct things .

Let’s take a study

“Why can’t you ever cook a decent meal, didn’t your mother teach you anything?”

Although you’re tired and you expected a delicious meal lovingly made, your choice of words show you’re a rude, critical and unthoughtful man. You don’t know how her day’s been at work, home, with the children. Control what you’re saying and flip your criticism to get what you want (below).

 

“I miss the biryani you make, my love”.

Remind your wife of the good she does for you and watch how it ignites a greater response the next time you meet. Couple the compliment with a physical touch. Generously punctuate requests with sweet words.

 

Financial security:

“Musa ibn J’afar (a.s) stated: ‘A man’s family members are his dependents. Thus whoever is bestowed with the blessings of Allah, should expand on his dependents’ comfort, or else such blessings may be taken away from him'(Bihar al-Anwar, vol l04, p 69)

The Shari‘ah (Islamic Law) recognizes the full property rights of women before and after marriage. They may buy, sell or lease any or all of their properties at will.She haas the right of dowry(mehr). For this reason, Muslim women may keep (and in fact they have traditionally kept) their maiden names after marriage, an indication of their independent property rights as legal entities.

Women love to feel secure.And she wants to feel secure of her future as well as the future of her children.When you are not doing enough in this regard,she can push herself into deep depression .It is an irony that when it comes to Chosing your life partner,you search for an educated,smart and talented and sometimes a working spouse.But After Marriage,you expect her to not ask about the financial management of the house.You don’t chose to reveal your Income,your spending and you don’t even bother to give her some money to save each month.In Such Circumstances how can you expect your Wife to be Pleased with you at all times?

It is not tough to make a woman happy.You will be surprised to Know that women are  such sensitive creatures who gets happy even with a single bar of Chocolate.

How Frequent Do You Flirt with Your Wife?

Relationship tips for Muslims

Have you ever wondered why do the women watch so many TV serials.Well,the serials take them to a world where they see romance, and they see love.although the serials take them to an imaginary world where the romeo can go to any advance for the juliet,Yet you don’t have to be a romeo.But still a little flirting never hurts.And do remember sex and love is not same.

The language of physical touch isn’t all about the bedroom. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, joy, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.

Quality activities are a very important ingredient to quality time. Spending physical time together, sharing hobbies and events that you love to do together, bring a couple closer, and, in the years to come, fill up a memory bank, insha-Allah, God willing.

Are You Thinking of A Divorce?

For the sake of Allah and for the sake of your innocent children, be forgiving towards each other.Please  Do not exaggerate trivial problems and do not persist in your arguments. Do not pick up faults with each other. Think of your future as well as that of your children.Remember! Your children rely on you and look up to you for their happiness. Have mercy upon them and do not destroy their lives.

Ref :  principles-marriage-family-ethics-ayatullah-ibrahim-amini

Also Read :Tips to Find a Spouse from Quran and Authentic Hadeeth


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.

Pakistani Actor Hamza Ali Abbasi,ex aetheist to quit acting for Allah and to Spread Islam.


In a video shared by him on Twitter, Hamza Ali Abbasi spoke about his journey – how he became an atheist when he was 14-15 years old and how science “brought him back” being a theist when he went to the US.

“I want to spend the rest of my life talking about God,” Abbasi said in the video-sharing that his decision is based on 10 years research.

Abbasi, who recently married Naimal Khawar, said that now he will try to shape his life in accordance with Islam and will try to spread across the message through various platforms.

“Being an ‘ex-atheist’, I want to share the answers I have received about God with people. I don’t want to debate or convince people, I just want to share,” he said and added that if he will make any movie or show, then it will be about Islam.

Read –What Allah says to the disbelievers


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.
babri masjid demolisher now a muslim

Man involved in Babri Masjid demolition now builds mosques to wash away guilt


Do you know that Kar sevak from Haryana who was part of Babri Masjid demolition, now preaches Islam, builds masjids ?He has built 90 Mosque so far.

Aamir, a former Shiv Sena leader from Panipat, Haryana often recalls the fateful day of December 6, 1992, that marked the demolition of Babri Masjid.

Aamir said that along with his friend Mohammed Umar, formerly Yogendra Pal, he had vowed to construct the Sri Ram Mandir at Ayodhya demolishing the masjid. Today, the two are fulfilling their pledge to renovate 100 mosques, in an attempt to purge themselves of their sins.

On December 1, 1992, Aamir reached Ayodhya to join thousands of kar sevaks coming from across the country. On December 6 that year, according to Aamir, he was the first man to climb the middle dome.

“We feared that the army might have been deployed in large number. But on ground there was hardly any security, that gave us a boost and we were mentally prepared to demolish the masjid that day,” said Mohammed Aamir.

Aamir along with many other kar sevaks from Sonipat and Panipat demolished the dome with spades and pickaxes.

“When I reached my home town Panipat after that I was given a hero’s welcome by the people,” Aamir said.

“But at home, my family’s reaction shocked me. My secular family denounced my actions. I had participated in the kar seva because I felt strongly about it, but I realized later that I was wrong.”

Mohammed Aamir, born a Rajput, said, “I realized that I had taken law in my hands and violated the constitution of India. Guilty, I embraced Islam.”

Ref :India Today.


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.

#Hijabisanidentity- Hijab walk to Stop the discrimination and marginalization of Muslim women and girls.


Freedom of religion is a fundamental human right in the Ghanaian legal system. To be specific Article 21 (c) of the 1992 Constitution states: “All persons shall have the right to freedom to practice any religion and to manifest such practice.”

Unfortunately, most Muslim women and girls living in Ghana have dealt with individuals who exert their biases and bigotry into institutional cultures. Thus, making it impossible for Muslim women to wear the hijab as part of their religious freedoms stipulated in the 1992 constitution.

The #Hijabisanidentity campaign pushes for the right of Muslim women who choose to wear the hijab to be free to do so without intimidation from any individual or institution.

Why do Muslim Woman Wear Hijab.

Recently, an invigilator of the West African Examination Council (WAEC) asked a candidate to remove her hijab before sitting her exams. This latest move sparked a recent social media campaign by Islam advocates dubbed: #Hijabisanidentity

They believe the successful campaign which culminated in a massive demonstration in some regions – North, Ashanti and Accra – will help shake up some traditionally-held cultural misconceptions about the female Muslim identity. On Saturday October 12, Ghanaian Muslim women marched for their right to wear the hijab. The #Hijabisanidentity campaign is still on.

Stop policing Women’s bodies!

My hijab, my CHOICE My choice, my right


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.
Sinead o connor

Sinéad O’Connor Performs in Hijab.Says : ‘I have been a Muslim all my life and I didn’t realise it’


Dublin: Singer Sinead O’Connor stepped out in a traditional hijab with her son after converting to Islam in October.

The 52-year-old wore a bright red abaya and matching hijab when she appeared on “The Late Late Show” in Dublin on Friday night, reports ” the sun”

Earlier in the day, she arrived at the studio with her son, 15-year-old Shane Lunny, who looks exactly like his mom.

Sinead was dressed more casually in blue trousers, a matching belted shirt, and a navy cardigan. She complete the look with a dark blue headscarf. Shane carried his mother’s red abaya to the venue.

Shane apart, Sinead is also mother to 32-year-old Jake, 23-year-old Roisin and 12-year-old Yeshua.

In October last year, Sinead announced that she had converted to Islam, changing her name to Shuhada Davitt.

Sinéad O’Connor has described how she felt “at home” after reading the Koran and subsequently embracing the Muslim religion.

The singer, who has returned following a five-year hiatus from touring, announced her decision to “revert” to Islam almost a year ago and says she often wears the hijab as a means of signalling her new-found beliefs.

The word ‘revert’ refers to the idea that if you were to study the Koran you would realise that you were a Muslim all your life and you didn’t realise it. That’s what happened to me,” she said on Friday night’s Late Late Show.

“I am 52. I grew up in a very different Ireland to the one that exists now and it was a very oppressed country religiously speaking. And everybody was miserable; nobody was getting any joy in God.

”The singer, who has long captivated audiences with her views on Irish life, spoke about reading the scriptures as a child and later exploring other religious texts “trying to find the truth about God”. She left Islam until last because she held her own prejudices about the religion, she said.

Ref :”The Sun”


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.
oldest rural mosque

Archeologists finds the World’s Oldest Rural Mosque in Israel


 Archaeologists in Israel have discovered the remains of one of the world’s oldest rural mosques, built around the time Islam arrived in the holy land,

world's oldest rural mosque

The Israel Antiquities Authority estimates that the mosque, uncovered ahead of new construction in the Bedouin town of Rahat in the Negev desert, dates back to the 7th to 8th centuries.

There are large mosques known to be from that period in Jerusalem and in Makkah but it is rare to find a house of prayer so ancient whose congregation is likely to have been local farmers, the antiquities authority said.

Play the Quiz : Identify these Mosques

Excavated at the site were the remains of an open-air mosque — a rectangular building, about the size of a single-car garage, with a prayer niche facing south toward Makkah.

“This is one of the earliest mosques known from the beginning of the arrival of Islam in Israel, after the Arab conquest of 636 C.E.,” said Gideon Avni of the antiquities authority.

“The discovery of the village and the mosque in its vicinity are a significant contribution to the study of the history of the country during this turbulent period.”

Source : Arab news


If You like this article Please Share it to help us keep providing you with more.
Loading...

Leave a comment.